Barb Weir: Netanyahu – Palestinian Settlements Are An Obstacle to Peace (Satire)
Israel Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu today denounced the establishment of a new Palestinian settlement in the area that Israel calls E1. The Palestinians are calling the new neighborhood Bab al-Shams (“Gate of the Sun”).
Palestinians build a new settlement on confiscated Palestinian land.
“This settlement and all Palestinian settlements are an obstacle to peace,” said Netanyahu in a prepared statement. “Building settlements on confiscated land is a way of creating facts on the ground and it increases the difficulty of negotiations. We have confiscated the land, so Palestinians have no right to build on it. They should build on land that we have not yet confiscated – after they have received the necessary permissions from Israeli authorities, of course, and not on disputed land.”
“What land is not confiscated or disputed?” I asked.
“…many Palestinians have found a very nice home in South America.”
“I’m sorry, but Israel never declares its borders, so I cannot answer that question. However, many Palestinians have found a very nice home in South America.”
“The Palestinians say that this land is traditionally and historically Palestinian and has no Hebrew connection.”
“That is patently false. The name ‘Bab al-Shams’ is a renaming of an older Hebrew name. It was originally called Eewon (E1), a typical Hebrew name, long before the Palestinians invented the name that they are now using.”
“So what action do you plan to take?”
“We are going to ask the United Nations to condemn the Palestinian Authority for not acting against these illegal Palestinian settlers.”
“Hasn’t the Palestinian Authority dissolved itself and reconstituted itself as the State of Palestine? Besides, the UN has no jurisdiction over the Palestinian Authority – only over the State of Palestine.”
“I’m sorry, but we refuse to legitimize the notion of a Palestinian state. If the Palestinian Authority no longer exists, we will have to call it something else.”
“The Palestinian entity.”
Source: Glossy News